One of my very best friends died of cancer recently. He was incredibly talented, able to do anything he set his mind to. Prophetically nicknamed “Jocko” by his father, he was also absolutely hilarious! I believe he gave that famous clown’s name nobility. Jocko could make me laugh like few other people I’ve known. He once phoned to ask if I’d return a power tool I borrowed from him, saying, “Hey, Grubby, can I get my saw back? I’m kinda’ excited, I think have a chance to loan it out again!”
I loved the guy. We laughed, cried and prayed together over our families, our faith and our hobbies. He and I spent much of our adult life working on one another’s projects. When we agreed to tackle a project, I’d rearrange my schedule, carefully consider how to approach the problem, pack my tools and drive to the project site. Jocko would inevitably be late. When he did show up, he never jumped right into the project. He’d lean against the work bench cradling a steaming cup of strong gas-station-coffee and pontificate about the project. As much as I enjoyed the banter, I couldn’t help peeking at my watch, anxious to get started. And then, just as my patience had all but abandoned me, he’d slap his forehead and say something like, “Oh, darn, I forgot my tools! I’ll be right back!” Or, “I forgot to tell you, I’ve gotta leave in about thirty minutes.”
It took great effort to successfully adapt to this part of my dear friend’s personality. I had to realize that this reoccurring frustration was just part of the package. It was one of many elements of his charm, his genius… it was who he was… and who he’d remain forever. I realized that in order to fully enjoy the upside of one of my favorite people, I had to accept the downside. Marilyn and I now lovingly invoke his name when we encounter it in others. Even today, it’s common to hear us encouragingly remind one another, “If you want Jocko, you get Jocko.”
Man, what I wouldn’t give to be Jocko’ed today. I’d love to be leaning against an old car in his garage, laughing ‘til Pepsi came out my nose.
My personal priority was to redeem the time. His personal priority was to enjoy the time. My value was productivity. His value was connectivity. I regret having taken so long to connect those dots and so I hope to encourage you to seize your personal moments with those you enjoy, in spite of their idiosyncrasies. Sometimes the very roses we need to stop and smell come with thorns.
Lord, I’m sorry I don’t fully appreciate the wonderful people You bring into my life. I pray I can adopt the same high value You place on others. Please equip me through your Holy Spirit to embrace the impact others have on my life as a gift from God. Amen.
Read Luke 10:38-42
- Do you associate with Martha or Mary in this passage—or both?
- Do you think Jesus was saying that those who are doers are always wrong?
- What do you think Jesus’ priority was in this story?
- Verse 41 reveals a pivotal issue in Martha. What was that issue?
- What was Jesus’ cure for Martha’s issue?
Read Matthew 16:21-23
- Peter’s desire was to protect Jesus, yet Jesus rebuked him, why?
- Describe how you might get in the way of God’s plan, even though you mean well.
- In verse 23, do you think Jesus really thought Peter was Satan?
- Have you ever considered that when we fail to cooperate with God we are actually helping Satan?
Read Romans 14:10-13
- In verse 13, what word is used to describe what we are doing when we look down on others?
- Why would Paul bring up the Judgment Seat of God in the context of us judging others?
- According to verse 11 who will be included in the final judgment by God?
- Consider how our judgment of others becomes a stumbling block for them?
- Have you ever been hurt by the judgment of others? How did that make you feel?
Dear Lord, please forgive me for assuming I’m qualified to pass judgment on others. Give me compassion to realize we are all imperfect and in need of one another’s grace, mercy and forgiveness. Thank You for your unending grace and forgiveness on me. Cause me to better appreciate the wonderful mix of personalities and idiosyncrasies of those I’m in relationship with and see them as a gift to my life. Amen.